There is an old legend regarding the Cherokee Indian youth’s Rite of Passage. When a boy is ready to become a man, the father takes his son into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is required to sit on a tree stump the entire night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to anyone. After he survives the night, he is considered a man. He cannot tell the other boys of this experience, because each boy must come into manhood on his own.

The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even humans who might do him harm.

During one boy’s ordeal the wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It was the only way he could become a man! Finally, after a horrific night the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm. 

What is the true meaning of a father’s relationship with his children? Love? Protection? Influence?

I love this story because it depicts the very core of who a loving, protective father is. What is the main objective of the boy being sent out into the wilderness for a night? He was going to leave a boy but come back a man. In this story, he NEVER left his father’s sight. The same holds true in our lives today. Our fathers are responsible for protecting us and guiding us into manhood so we can do the same for our sons and daughters.

In light of aspiring to be the best dads we can be, here are 8 characteristics of fathers who have inspired me the most:

1. He protects.

A father protects and guides his children physically when they’re young and emotionally as they mature. A father is the main provider of security and will make sure his family is safe, at all costs. He will put his own life on the line to keep his family safe.

2. He challenges.

A father keeps his children’s’ interests in front of his. He wants to see his children dream big and be the best individuals they can be. He lets them make mistakes and gives them the freedom to resolve their own conflicts. A good father knows he must sacrifice his own comfort to let his children learn.

3. He shows affection.

A father communicates security and worth to his kids through actions, as well as words. He is loving, compassionate, and quick to encourage.

4. He equips.

A father equips his children with a passion to live life well. A father takes every opportunity to equip and empower so his children will not be shaken when they go through life’s storms.

5. He disciplines.

A good father doesn’t just discipline, he models self-discipline. He knows that sometimes tough love is the best kind of love, but he does this through the power of his words, not in angry outrage. He understands his children will make mistakes, but he always disciplines from a place of love, not from a place of anger.

6. He is joyful.

A father enjoys all that life has to offer. He loves life and is not so preoccupied with his job that he forgets about going to the park with his kids. A father isn’t on his Blackberry while his 6-year-old daughter is up on stage performing at a dance recital.

7. He “walks the walk.”

A father practices what he preaches. He leads his family with rigor and grit. He loves his wife and shows to his children that she is the standard of beauty to him. When a father can walk the walk before his kids, it changes everything. A good father knows he must sacrifice his own comfort to let his children see what it is like to live a life of influence.

8. He loves unconditionally.

A good father loves his family with a love that can move mountains. This is the greatest quality of a good father. Even though he doesn’t want to love his children unconditionally ALL of the time, a father loves his children anyway.

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On behalf of Urbane + Gallant, I wish you a very Happy Father’s Day!